When There Is Nothing Left But Love
On Enlightenment, Football, and Valentine's Day
This is Valentine’s week, and I wanted to write a little bit about love, but not the Hallmark Channel version of love. That is what the Hallmark Channel is for.
In most Hallmark movies, the main character is enjoying a less-than-perfect experience of love, simply because circumstances have convinced this person that this example of love is the best there is. After a series of events, they are introduced to something real, and realize that anything other than the real thing is not worth having. They soon decide that any sacrifices they need to make are worth the cost of this experience. Normally it all ties up in a neat little bow at the end and everyone lives happily ever after.
But love is not always like that. And love does not always tie up neatly at the end.
And love is not always about romance.
These days in humanity’s evolution we seem to be experiencing a lot of the lack of love. Wars can be thought of as the ultimate experience of the lack of love. We kill other humans because in some way we feel that their existence is threatening our own. We see ourselves as separate from another human because they are different in some way. They probably see us in the same way.
Whether we live in an area that is experiencing the tragedy of war, or whether we are demonizing our neighbors for thinking differently than we do, or believing differently, or looking differently, or loving differently, anytime we perceive that we are separate from someone else for any reason is an expression of lack of love. And this means we have not yet achieved enlightenment.
I love this quote by Thich Nhat Hanh that “enlightenment is when the wave realizes it is the ocean.”
But I equally love this quote I came across recently, which I have been unable to attribute to anyone in particular, which says “enlightenment is when you realize that there is nothing left but love.”
I also agree with the statement that if you believe you are enlightened, you are not.
I believe that we are all enlightened to some degree, if we are in the pursuit of it, but we may not really reach it while we are incarnated as a human. We may have moments when we realize the truth of who we are, but we easily forget when faced with life’s struggles.
If we think about the ocean, we can understand that the experience of each droplet of water is different depending on what is going on around it, and even if it is aware of itself as the ocean, sometimes when it is getting pushed down towards the bottom of the ocean under every other droplet of water, or perhaps sucked up into a cloud due to evaporation, its experience of being water or of being the ocean is going to be affected by what its current experience is.
Yesterday I watched the Superbowl with my husband. I am not normally that interested in football, but became interested, when I witnessed some deep spiritual truths being played out on the field, and even in the commercials. I immediately noticed that some of the players had “choose love” on the back of their helmets, and others did not. Did that mean that some of the players were choosing love and others were choosing not to love? Did the choose love mean something specific, other than just be a good person?
When someone says “choose love” and displays it on their football helmet, are they called to a higher degree of social responsibility than someone who just decides to be a good person without calling attention to it?
I am reminded of Glenda in the movie “Wicked” who loved to do nice things but always did them while other people were watching so that she could get accolades for her good deeds. She claimed to be a good and kind person, but in life, always had everything handed to her. She had never experienced any difficulties, and could never understand if life was not handed to her on a silver platter. Perhaps her lack of magical abilities came from living a privileged life, and never needing to go within herself to access the strength and magic that comes from experiencing suffering.
As an outsider who doesn’t really follow football, it seemed to me that the favored quarterback was having a bad day, much to the chagrin of the announcers. Instead of singing the praises of the team who was crushing it, they chose to focus on the losing quarterback, and how this loss would follow him for the rest of his career. This speaks to me of how our losses and struggles in life can be a defining moment for us, for good or bad. Other people are certainly going to call attention to our worst moments. This quarterback is going to have to live down this loss in a big way, and will have the opportunity to use this dark moment as a catalyst to a rebirth of some kind, or he can choose to sit in the mire of his loss and feel sorry for himself. I am guessing he will probably do both.
In writing the book with Jesus about healing religious trauma, there is a portion of the book where I talk about his cross experience. Jesus had told me years ago that the cross experience was not what people thought. It was not a sacrifice for the sins of humanity, but rather an initiation into a higher realm of enlightenment for him. Jesus was at the worst moment of his life. He felt completely forsaken by God. But instead of being bitter or blaming those who were murdering him, he recognized that they were only doing what they thought was the right thing. He chose to see them in their frailty, in the illusion of their reality, and recognize that they were doing the best they could in that moment.
I would like to propose that these days we are being tempted to judge those who are making bad choices. We are being given the opportunity to see that everyone is doing the best they can, given their own perspective of the truth. There are a lot of moving parts, and I am sure many things will transpire over the course of the next year or years which will change the way we live our lives. Perhaps we will be affected in a tragic way, and perhaps it will all work itself out somehow.
What we need to realize that, in the end, there is only love.
The only way we experience love is to first experience the lack of love. Many who are in positions of power do not understand what love is, or they would not be behaving the way they do. Maybe this is an opportunity for them to finally find out what love is by perpetrating what it is not. And maybe those of us who have experienced love, and who may be experiencing difficulties due to their actions will have an opportunity to love them anyway. And maybe we have to in order to have an awakening of some kind.
Enlightenment only comes when we realize that there is nothing else but love.
Be love. Love yourself. Love others. Try to see love from every angle.
Most people generally think that the way they are thinking is the right way. It is not human nature to consider that there may be another side to the story.
Yes. Protest if you feel it is your job to do so. Stand up and say no to the lack of love. Set boundaries. Post “I choose love” on your football helmet, while at the same time doing acts of love and kindness to others. But in the end, if we are to achieve enlightenment, we will need to realize that love really is all there is. It may appear that there is the lack of love, just as darkness is the lack of light. But in reality, darkness doesn’t exist, just the absence of light.
It is only by turning on the light that we can chase away the dark. Shouting at it, protesting it, or even “casting it out” does not get rid of it. But turning on the light works every time.
Let us fight hate with love. Not with shouting and protesting and judging it. But by turning on love. Shine a light on what lack of love looks like, much like a couple of the Superbowl commercials.
One day we will not remember what the lack of love feels like because all of us will realize there is nothing but love. But for now, let us remember to love.
Happy Valentines Day
Here are those buttons you have been waiting for! Feel free to subscribe, share, comment, and check out my website if that is your desire. Thank you for your interest in my ability to receive spiritual insight while also watching football. And movies.