The Hero, The Victim, and the Villain

Who Are You In Your Story?

Recently I shared one of my articles on social media, which I do every time I publish one. This was not an unusual decision.

For some reason I guess the Facebook algorithm decided to share outside what is my normal demographic and I began to receive reactions I was not accustomed to receiving. I was called Satan. Some chose to post Bible verses proclaiming that I was cursed and anyone who listened to me was also cursed. I was even accused of setting children on fire (what???)

After the initial shock subsided, I blocked and deleted one of the posts but decided to leave up the comment about being Satan just for a reminder that everyone is living by some sort of story that they either made up or chose to believe based on social conditioning.

In every good story, there usually three components. The hero, the victim, and the villain. In some stories, the lines are clearly defined. This character is the hero. This one is the victim. This one is the villain. Any other characters in the story are supporting, opposing, or neutral in the story of the three main characters.

In a really good story, and even in everyday life, sometimes the lines between the three are smudged. Not everything is black and white. Who is the hero, who is the victim, and who is the villain is often more complicated and even a bit more elusive.

Recently, Spirit gave me this as a journal prompt: What is the story of your life? What are you telling yourself about who you are and who you are in the story you portray of yourself to the world?

As I contemplated this prompt, I asked myself: Am I the hero? Am I the victim? Or am I the villain?

I think we tell ourselves a variety of stories about ourselves. In one scenario we are the hero.

This is the part of the story where we are the savior of the universe. We have come into the world to right a wrong. To heal a wound. To make the world a better place than we found it.

For my personal mission statement, I adapted the one that Jesus stated as his mission statement.

I am here to proclaim the good news to the poor. To heal the brokenhearted; to free those imprisoned in dungeons of their own making; to assist the spiritually blind in awakening. (My own adaptation of Luke 4:18)

I still have a version of this mission statement on the wall in the room where I do personal sessions with clients. This is the arena where I am the hero.

But am I also the victim? The villain?

The villain is also fairly easy to recognize. In this part of my story, this is the me that has intentionally or unintentionally wounded others. The part of my story where my actions, words, or intentions affected others in a hurtful way. I am sure there are humans out there who will attest to my acknowledgement that, yes, my actions affected them in a negative way. I am certainly a villain to those who believe my gifts are bestowed on me by the devil. To some I am the villain in their story based on my actions and to others my very existence is offensive.

No one is perfect.

No, not even Jesus. I have come to understand that there have been many things done under the banner of Jesus which were and are hurtful. There are many who consider Jesus the villain. I admit freely that Jesus was the villain in my personal story for many years, until Jesus and I worked on our issues. I had years of religious upbringing which wounded me deeply. I had enough that I wrote a book about it!

What about the victim?

Most of us who are evolving spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically can point at some aspect of our lives over which we have no control. In some ways, we can agree that we are victim to something or someone who seems to hold some sort of power over us or who has affected us in a way that was or is not pleasant.

Who or what makes you feel powerless? Who or what do you blame for your struggles in life?

For years I blamed Jesus and my religious upbringing. I gave my power over to a belief system which labeled me as a sinner from birth. A belief system that shamed me into believing that I was inherently flawed. One in which only they had the answer to that flaw. One in which I was rushed into an unhealthy marriage because I had so much shame I could not imagine making a decision on my own without someone who knows more than me telling me what was right for me. One that I could never seem to escape from, despite doing all the things that should have secured my freedom.

But my judgement of that belief system was also flawed.

The truth is, you are only a victim if you believe yourself to be. I could have risen above and freed myself at any time. But I was afraid. I was a victim to fear.

Most of the time, we are a victim to the beliefs and emotions that keep us trapped in a limited life with limited resources for self-empowerment.

In the story of Jesus' birth, he was all three. He was the obvious hero of the story. No one needs reminded that he was born to be the savior of the world. To some people in the story, however, he was the villain. His presence threatened their way of life, their power, or their authority. That is why there were attempts on his life. The attempts on his life made him also the victim. The powers that were in control at the time were trying to erase him from the story.

In any story, we realize that the lines between hero, victim and villain are often elusive. We can all admit that in our own life story, we are all three, depending on what chapter of your story you are either remembering, re-living, or creating moment to moment.

Take a moment today to think about your story. What is the story of your life? Who are you in the story right now? Are you the hero? Are you the victim? Or are you the villain?

Can you acknowledge that it only takes a shift of awareness and intention to move your perspective to another version of you in the story? Look at your life from someone else's perspective. Who are you in their story? Do you need to make amends for past errors in judgement? Do you need to rise up and stop requiring someone else to rescue you from your latest calamity? Do you believe that you are in some way unable to make important life choices on your own?

Just for today, be the hero in your own story! Stop blaming something or someone for your struggles in life. Stop doing things that are detrimental to the well-being of yourself and others, if you can help it. Be your own hero, and if you have time, be the hero for someone else.

Think about a belief or an emotion that keeps you from living your best life. Decide today to begin to address and heal the things that keep you from being the hero in your own story.

Create your own mission statement! Why are you here? How can you be the hero in your own story?

I heard a really good one from Abraham-Hicks that I really like:

I am going to do everything I can to be really, really, really happy. And then I am going to do whatever I have time to do after that.

If you feel happy and secure in your belief system, then there is no reason to question it. But if not, it is okay to explore other options. Don't be shamed into believing that there will be consequences if you veer off of the path.

After the reaction I received from my social media post, I did a little check-in with the Guides. They actually were the ones who suggested I leave the comments up.

They reminded me that we don’t grow by only surrounding ourselves with those who love us or agree with us all the time. We grow when there is resistance and we are required to address that resistance. If you go to the gym, you will not get stronger by always lifting the one-pound weights. The stronger you get and the longer you work out, you begin to find that you have to periodically shift your workout or increase the resistance in order to continue to get stronger.

I accept that not everyone is going to love me or agree with me, in the same way I don’t always agree with everyone else. However, I bless all those out there who choose to publicly renounce me and wish them well. I hope that their faith is giving them what they need and when it ceases to do so, they will be open to looking for something else.

We don’t make the world a more loving and peaceful place by engaging in senseless arguments (or calling people Satan). We bring peace to the world by sending Divine Love and Peace to all, regardless of beliefs.

Let us all choose to love one another, despite any differences in our beliefs, our spiritual practices, our political opinions, our culture, or any of the other things that divide us. We are all one.

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